So much has happened, that the more revelations that unfold, we are now just taking it in our stride. Bullying is a terrible thing, homophobia and a disregard for illness, equally so. Having to suffer at the hands of criminals and liars, in order to cause maximum damage, is inexcusable, dangerous and will cause life long pain and trauma.
I was told to forget a period of my life, as 'Not Real', manipulated by others and creating everlasting loss and bitterness. I have suffered a change in medical status and relapse, bought about by triggers, I am only now fully understanding. Post traumatic stress, rapid cycling, neglect and humiliated by others, when I was at my most vulnerable, the rapid deterioration of my partners health has been so terrifying, none of us could really quite believe it. He continues to receive threatening and blackmailing calls and is in a fragile state. To be used, abused and suffer severe psychiatric injury by others to secure their sick twisted pleasure is unbelievable. I have been jailed, thrown my head into icy cold water, to prevent pain, ill advised, patronised, victimised and intimidated.
My friends have coped with some dreadfully disturbing times. They have witnessed decline, suicide attempts and Mania, that I can't fully understand. Whilst others stayed silent, those who were close got us through. I have resigned from a job I love, in order to preserve what dignity I have left. We have been advised to leave The UK as soon as possible, change our names and start over again, at a time where our health continues to falter.
On the plus side I have seen some wonderful acts of genuine love and respect. Those closest have endured what we have, cried with us, saved my life and seen me sedated to within an inch of my life, forgetting two months of my life. Selfless acts of kindness and stability, to make our lives a little more comfortable has been our saving grace. Without them, God knows what would have happened.
Was all this worth it? Well quite frankly, yes. We have sacrificed our life in order to stand up for something we believe in. Foolish probably, leaving our destiny in tatters, but with the realisation, that our life had to change. It has and will do further. When we arrive at our new home, the danger of relapse is very real, but now for the first time in my life I am having to do this without medication. I will no longer live in a haze, because others deem it to be right. I have had to be strong beyond my years, accept loss and shock, but this is really making me fight harder and harder for survival. One day, so will you!
Our marriage was the happiest day of our life and that was the bonus this year. Everyone who attended made it a very special day, those who didn't were just part of the most heinous circumstances, anyone could suffer. One day, someone will be made accountable and I will do my bit to make it happen, even if it kills me. Thanks to all for all your support and help. it made all the difference!